Mom Life

The summer is winding down and I’ve been trying (and trying and trying) to get myself and my kids organized for the new school year. I’ve also been busy in the kitchen preparing meals for all of my friends who’ve recently welcomed new babies. This got me thinking about the baby gifts that I’ve loved receiving and giving over the years.

The Woombie-I know that this thing kind of looks like a baby straight jacket, but, if your baby sleeps best when swaddled, it’s a lifesaver. I know people swear by the miracle blanket, but for me the zip-up woombie was a lot easier to deal with during middle of the night diaper changes.

Diaper Caddy-This is the gift I love to buy for first time parents. This thing was such a staple in our downstairs over the last eight years that when my friend came to visit last month she asked where it was. It has plenty of room for diapers and wipes, extra socks, onesies, whatever you need on hand, and the drawer at the bottom is great to store lotions and medicines. We still take this with us on every road trip.

Itzy Ritzy Mom Boss 4-in-1 Nursing Cover– I’m a little obsessed with stripes, so I love this little  black and white number that works as a nursing cover, shopping cart cover, car seat cover and infinity scarf.

Muslin blankets– I know these breathable lightweight blankets are a no-brainer, but I had to list them because I loved the foxy print above. These blankets double as awesome nursing and carseat covers during crazy hot Richmond summers. Bonus use: My girls love using them to wrap up their dolls.

Baby Shusher– The idea behind this shusher is pretty genius. You put it into your baby’s crib or careseat and it makes a loud shushing sound, similar to what’s recommended in The Happiest Baby on the Block, and shushes baby to sleep.

Bubzi Co. Owl– Here’s another option for soothing baby. This owl can go directly in the crib or hang from it and plays ten different lullabies and has a soft nightlight. Plus you can pop out the speaker in the middle and throw the whole stuffed owl in the wash.

Nose Frida– I’m not going to lie, the idea of this product really grosses me out, but after years of trying, and failing, to successfully use one of those bulb syringes to clear my babies’ sinuses, I’d definitely be willing to try this if I had another baby. If it helps babies breathe and sleep soundly, it’s a great gift.

High-Quality Thermometer– Someone got me one of these when my third was born. It’s such an awesome gift because I’m still using it all the time, almost four years later. I love that you can use it as a forehead thermometer with babies, and then switch to the ear for older kids.

Baby First Aid Kit– This labeled caboodle (remember those?) is this organized mama’s dream come true. You don’t have to neatly label everything, but a container filled with baby health and first aid supplies would make a great gift.

Blooming Bath– These adorable and portable “petals” turn any sink into a baby bath tub! It’s a great gift for those who don’t have a tub or who frequently travel.

Door Silencer– We’ve all snuck out of our child’s rooms trying to ensure that they stay asleep only to be foiled by a loud door. You can find these ingenious little guys on Etsy.

Koalaty 3-in-1 Universal Infant Travel Tote– This travel bag converts to a portable crib so baby can sleep anywhere.

On-the-go Changing Mat– This is another product that I used for years and years. I know a lot of diaper bags come with their own changing pads, but the ones I had with mine were always too small. With my second I would often leave the diaper bag in the car and just bring this thing stuffed with diapers, wipes, and extra underwear for my potty training 2 year old. It even has zipped pockets in the front for your wallet, phone and keys.

Personalized Bedtime Book– This beautifully illustrated personalized book is a great gift option.

Gift certificate to Blythe– Let’s face it: Most nursing bras are super ugly. This isn’t true at Blythe where everything is beautiful. You can get the support you need at large sizes, without having to sacrifice on style.

Duo Diary– This would be such a sweet gift. It’s a diary to keep track of what’s going on with your baby AND you. From their website:

On one page, you can track health points and activities for your baby – breastfeeding, pumping, bottle feeding, sleep, wet and dirty diapers, plus space to write down any symptoms, behaviors, or patterns- or even just a place to write down memories, to-do’s, or anything else that helps you. On the opposite page is a page for you– a space where you can support your new postpartum health by keeping track of basic (yet often overlooked for new moms) health activities, like food journaling, sleep, water intake, exercise, and more space to write down any postpartum symptoms, self care reminders, or just journaling. It’s all in here- everything you need to nurture your baby and yourself.

Photo Credit: It’s a Mother Thing

Mama Care Package– I love putting together care packages as gifts, especially for moms who already have a lot of the baby gear listed above. Nursing tanks, chocolate, magazines, lotion, lavender sleep spray, the possibilites are endless!

Laundry Basket Baby Kit- This is a great gift for the shower attendee on a budget. Simply purchase a cheap laundry basket and fill it with basic baby supplies: Onesies, pacifiers, laundry detergent, bottles, teethers, etc.

Diapers and Wipes– Again, this is a very practical gift, but it’s one moms will always appreciate. You can always attach something cute to the box like an adorable dress or stuffed animal.

Take Them a Meal Service Signup– Take Them a Meal allows you to create a signup and customize a meal delivery schedule for new parents. My neighborhood sets this up every time we welcome a new baby. It really makes peoples’ lives easier those first few months.

With so many baby products on the market, I hope this list helps you narrow down the things that parents, both new and experienced (are any of us ever really experienced?), will find useful!

♥ Erin

Obviously, we all love our kids. They are beautiful, lovable gifts and the sun rises and sets with them and all that. However, they are also serious, all-consuming, time-suckers! If you catch me in the morning, you’ll find a mom full of grand plans and maybe even a sprinkle of energy, but by 3 pm you’ll most likely find a blob, sort of resembling me, being smothered on the couch, still trying to finish her morning coffee. It’s amazing how much such small people can suck all of that motivation right out of you. This is why these hacks are so important. They save us time, energy and sanity, all things that are pretty hard to come by these days. Read on for twenty of my favorites, perfect for parents of young children.

Photo Credit: Infarrantly Creative

1. This genius way to organize measuring tools. I waste so much time looking for the right spoon when I’m cooking/baking, and I’m always needing to google measurement conversions, so this speaks to my soul. I love that it’s all tucked on the inside door of a cabinet. It seems like a pretty straight forward DIY project that even I wouldn’t screw up!

2  This cheap and easy travel bed. Take three pillow cases, sew them together and then stuff them with pillows. Somehow over the years we have amassed a large collection of pillows and their cases so I’m definitely making one or two of these to use for sleepovers. If you can’t sew, like me, you can use Liquid Stitch found here.

Photo Credit: Quilt Keepsake

3. This adorable heirloom quilt! OMG, I’m completely not talented enough to do this, but I had to share the idea. Sew your child’s outgrown baby clothes into a quilt and then save it to give to them when they have their own children. If you love this idea as much as I do, but you flunked Home Ec. too, here’s a link to a quilt company who can make it for you.

Photo credit: Infarrantly Creative

4. This clever board game hack. Frame board games and hang them on the wall as playroom decorations. Put command hooks on the back of the frame to hang sandwich bags with all the game pieces and spinners. I LOVE this idea because we are always losing game pieces. Pick up cheap frames at Dollar Tree or shop the frame sales at Michaels.

Photo credit: Mom Hacks 4 Everyday

5. This idea for keeping track of those mischievous baby socks. Speaking of losing things, it’s been three years since I’ve had a baby, but I still have a collection of tiny socks missing their other half! You don’t have to be like me. You can keep them together by putting them inside a mesh laundry bag whenever you wash them. This also works great for legos or other little toys you find yourself needing to put through the wash.

Photo credit: Alana C. Valentine

6. This way to make sure your child takes all of their medicine. Let’s be honest, with everything going on in our lives right now, how often have you forgotten if you gave your kid their antibiotics for their latest ear infection? Or even worse, miscommunicated with your spouse and ended up double dosing your kid? It happens, but with this easy hack you can keep track of whether or not they’ve had their medicine and also how many days they need to continue to take it.

Photo credit: Princess and the P Baby

7. This idea that makes snack time a breeze. I would say about 50% of the conversations I have with my kids center around them telling me they want a snack and then asking me to recount every single thing we have to eat. How much easier would be if they could just ask, Can I have a snack? and then after I said yes, go to the pantry and choose something from one of the pre-approved snack baskets. Purchase cheap baskets like the ones pictured above at Dollar Tree.

Photo credit: The Not So Perfect Mom

8. This way to make meal and snack time feel like play time. Toddlers love eating food out of ice cube trays or muffin tins. I’m not sure why, but I think something about the novelty and variety appeals to them. It’s a great way to get them to try new, colorful fruits and vegetables.

Photo credit: Melissa Sabra

9. This idea for keeping bibs handy. I don’t know why I never thought of this, because we always have some of those command hooks around our house. Great idea to avoid lost bibs!

10. This genius trick for ridding your home of the herpes of the craft world! Glitter is seriously not welcome in my home. If you’re a kinder, sparklier mom than I, this seems like such a smart and easy way to pick up the glitter pieces that manage to adhere to every surface of your house. Good luck to you!

Photo credit: One Crazy House

11. This easier way to keep little hands clean. Use empty shampoo or soap bottles as faucet extenders. I’ve spent eight years lifting my kids up to help them reach the sink. Believe me, your back will thank you for this hack!

Photo Credit: The Realistic Mama

12. This idea for keeping snacks healthier on the road. Have you ever found yourself starving, but stuck in the car with no food? When I find myself in that situation I usually blink and somehow find a frappuccino or Chick-Fil-A nugget in my hand. How did that happen? Stop hunger from getting the best of your good intentions and keep a basket full of healthy snacks in your car for you and the kids.

Photo credit: Lemon Lime Adventures

13. This creative car cleaning idea, perfect for road trips. Wrap a piece of duct tape, sticky side out, around your hand, and use it to pick up crumbs and other dirt in the car. If your kids are old enough to help, wrap it around their shoes instead. They can have fun getting their wiggles out while helping clean up.

Photo credit: A Life From Scratch

14. This kit that helps you stay prepared for life’s emergencies. I love this clear kit from Courtney at A Life From Scratch. Check out the link above for the what and why of everything she put into it.

Photo credit: We Love Being Moms

Photo credit: Central Coast Teaching Tots

15 & 16. These two awesome uses for hot glue. Use it to stop kids’ shoes from skidding and slipping. Use it to stop up holes in bath toys to prevent mold growth. However you use it, hot glue for the win!

Photo credit: Parkingpalmagnet.com

17. This idea for keeping kids safe in the parking lot. When you are loading groceries, or getting a baby out of the car, sometimes your older child may have a desire to wander. I would usually just yell at my kids to, “Touch the van!!”, but it would be great to give them a specific spot to hold onto. You can use a large car sticker, or buy the stickers pictured above here.

Photo credit: The Paper Mama

18. These safety tips for parents with kids who like to wander off. In the photo above, Chelsey from The Paper Mama, used a marker and New Skin liquid bandage to create a waterproof tattoo on her child. You can use the tattoo to provide easy contact info if your child gets lost in a crowd or to communicate a food allergy on children who aren’t old enough to tell people themselves. When you get home, simply add another layer of New Skin and the tattoo just wipes right off.

Next, before you head out for a day at the beach, amusement park, or any other crowded place, take a family photo. Not only will you have a great photo, but if anyone gets lost, you have a visual of what they look like that day, what they were wearing, etc. So easy, but so smart!

Photo credit: One Creative Housewife

19. This awesome hack for helping toddlers put on their shoes. This is one of my favorites because it is cheap and easy, but it really helps kids figure out their left from their right. This will save you so much time!

20. This sleep tip that promises to help you fall asleep fast. If you’re someone who feels exhausted all day, but has worries keeping them up at night, this 4-7-8 sleep technique from Dr. Andrew Weil is for you. Practice the breathing exercise below twice a day, and within a few weeks you should notice a difference in the time it takes you to go to sleep.

• Exhale completely.
• Inhale for a count of 4.
• Hold your breath for a count of 7.
• Exhale for a count of 8. Repeat for 4 cycles.

Hopefully these hacks can save you some time and perhaps even your sanity! If you can’t get enough parenting hacks, check out Alonzo Lerone’s collection of hilarious hacks from veteran parents who seem to have it all figured out! You’re welcome.

♥ Erin

Parent Hack: Wine. LMFAO. So much truth!

Before I had three children, and the exhaustion that comes along with them, I was an avid reader. These days I can count on one hand the number of books I read in a year. Five pages in, you’ll usually find me passed out, or I may start awake when I drop the book that I was holding onto my face. If I’m going to get through a whole book in less than three months, it’s gotta hold my attention. Here’s a list of eighteen books that do just that.

18 Books You Won’t Want To Put Down:

The Dependents by Katharine Dion– When Gene’s wife of 49 years dies, it’s subtly revealed to him that she wasn’t as happy in the marriage as he thought she was. Why did she seem happiest when vacationing with their best friends Ed and Gayle? What secrets was she keeping? Throughout this beautifully-written and engrossing novel, Gene questions everything he thought he knew about his wife, his family and himself. This is Katherine Dion’s first book, but she writes like a master, answering questions on how to overcome grief and let go of the expectations that we project onto others. It’s so much more than a beach read.

The Word is Murder by Anthony Horowitz– This murder mystery novel is so inventive because Horowitz actually writes himself into it as the loyal sidekick to Detective Inspector Hawthorne. The story begins with a woman walking into a funeral parlor to plan her own funeral. The woman is murdered six hours later. You won’t be able to stop reading this creepy and clever whodunnit.

The Lost Family by Jenna Blum– This heart-breaking book tells the story of Peter, a handsome chef at a Manhattan restaurant in the 1960s. Women from all over town come to his restaurant hoping to peak his interest, but he is consumed by grief over losing his wife and two daughters to Auschwitz. He can’t escape the guilt of surviving when they did not. Eventually he meets someone, falls in love again, and has another daughter, but, as we follow him over the next twenty years, he’s still haunted by memories and pain. Yes, this book will probably make you cry, but you’ll fall in love with the characters and remember them long after you finish reading. Jenna Blum also wrote the wonderful book, Those Who Save Us, another amazing read!

The Kiss Quotient by Helen Hoang– This is an erotic romance with a twist. Stella is a workaholic economist with Asperger’s Syndrome. She’s very successful in her career, but inexperienced and awkward in the love department. Her family is very eager for grandchildren, but Stella doesn’t even know how to French kiss. She decides that the best thing to do is hire some professional help. Enter Michael, an escort earning money to pay his mother’s medical bill. The two form an unlikely partnership that slowly and hilariously morphs into more.

An American Marriage by Tayari Jones– This book, Oprah’s Book Club pick for 2018, is a powerful and important read. Newlyweds Celestial and Roy are two successful professionals excited to settle into their new lives together, but they are soon ripped apart when Roy is arrested for a crime that Celestial knows he didn’t commit. Celestial finds herself hopeless and unsure of what to do. She finds solace in her childhood friend, Andre. After five years, Roy’s conviction is overturned and he returns home to try to rekindle what he had with Celestial, but it isn’t as simple as he thought. This story is full of relatable characters, and important thoughts on race, class and family, a must-read.

What the Eyes Don’t See by Mona Hanna-Attisha– This riveting non-fictional story centers around it’s author, Dr. Mona, a Flint, Michigan pediatrician who proved that Flint’s kids were being exposed to lead in their drinking water, and that the government knew this and intentionally covered it up. She fought her own government to expose that truth to the world. This book reads like a scientific thriller, but every word of it is true. The story of a city coming together to fight for justice and a future for their children is  powerful and moving, and it makes you question what you thought you knew about the good ol’ USA.

Goodbye, Sweet Girl by Kelly Sundberg– Kelly Sundberg has written an incredibly honest and brave memoir about her decade long marriage and how it slowly transformed from a beautiful love story to a horribly abusive horror show. She’s open about her feelings of fear and anger, and also the love and compassion that she still felt for her husband. It’s such an accurate and open portrayal of why people stay in a relationship even when they know it’s slowing killing them. I know this story sounds bleak, but Sundberg writes in a way that lighters the subject somehow, while still touching us with understanding. This is a page-turner that may also have the power to save lives.

The Perfect Mother by Aimee Molloy– This book is utterly unputdownable! The May Mothers, a group of moms whose babies were born in the same month, get together for a moms night out one hot Fourth of July night. While they are out, one of their babies is taken from his crib. The book tells the story of the desperate search to find the him and the secrets revealed and friendships destroyed along the way. Right now it’s being made into a movie starring Kerry Washington.

A Man With One of Those Faces by Caimh McDonnell– This is the first book in a three part series of hysterically funny thrillers. Someone is trying to kill Paul Mulchrone. The first time it was a case of mistaken identity, but the second was no accident. Now, with the help of a nurse who fancies herself an expert detective and a violent rebel cop, he must solve one of the worst crimes that Ireland has ever seen.

The Wife Between Us by Greer Hendricks and Sarah Pekkanen–

If you enjoyed Gone Girl and The Girl on the Train, you’ll love this book. I don’t want to give anything away with this one so I’m just going to leave you with this vague, but intriguing description from the book cover itself:

When you read this book, you will make many assumptions.
You will assume you are reading about a jealous ex-wife.
You will assume she is obsessed with her replacement – a beautiful, younger woman who is about to marry the man they both love.

Assume nothing.

Twisted and deliciously chilling, Greer Hendricks and Sarah Pekkanen’s The Wife Between Us exposes the secret complexities of an enviable marriage – and the dangerous truths we ignore in the name of love.

The Woman in the Window by A.J. Finn– In this Hitchcock-esque thriller, Anna Fox, a recluse, living alone in her NYC home, passes time by spying on her neighbors. When a new family moves across the way, Anna sees something that she was not meant to see. What she sees will change her life forever and make her question everything. Nothing is what it appears to be in this twisty and gripping thriller.

Little Fires Everywhere by Celeste Ng- Elena Richardson is a rule-follower. Rules keep her family safe and keep order in her world. Enter Mia and her daughter Pearl, tenants that move into a house that the Richardsons own. All of the Richardsons are drawn to the artistic and mysterious mother/daughter. When a family friend of the Richardsons tries to adopt a baby, a battle for custody follows that divides their small town in two, with Elena and Mia at the center and on opposing sides. Elena, angry at the way Mia has upended her orderly life, goes on a mission to find out what secrets the enigmatic woman has been keeping. This obsession will lead to some pretty devastating consequences.

Safekeeping by Jessamyn Hope- In 1994, Adam, a drug-addict from New York, travels to Israel to live on a kibbutz, a community similar to a co-op. Atoning for past sins, he has promised to deliver a sapphire brooch to a woman that his grandfather loved when he lived on the Kibbutz in the 1940s.  The woman proves difficult to find, but on his journey he meets many interesting characters, all hoping for another chance at redemption. This book tells an emotional story of second chances and family history, and reminds us that nothing in life is permanent.

11/22/63 by Stephen King- This futuristic thriller tells the story of Jake Epping, a high school English teacher turned time traveler who goes back in time to the 1950s to try and prevent the Kennedy assassination. It may seem far-fetched, but what follows is an engrossing, heart-pumping page-turner.

Maybe Someday by Colleen Hoover- This modern romance novel tells the story of Sydney, a college student who discovers that her perfect boyfriend has been cheating on her. Soon after she finds herself drawn to her mysterious and passionate neighbor, Ridge. Their sexy and obsessive love affair changes her in ways she never expected. Hoover’s writing style and character development really draws you in and gets you hooked from page one.

Tell Me Lies by Carola Lovering– This tale of obsessive love centers on Lucy and Stephen and alternates between both points of view. Lucy is looking for a fresh start when she travels from the only home she’s ever known on Long Island to her small California college. Stephen is also eager to forget the past and a secret that could ruin his future. Their tale of addicting obsession leads to consequences that are more than they can handle. This witty and dark coming-of-age story is just perfect for a day at the beach.

Think of a Number by John Verdon– When threatening letters show up in people’s mailboxes, those people begin to die. The letters tell the readers to “Think of a number and see how well I know your secrets.” The recipients are shocked when the author of the letters has somehow read their minds correctly. Dave Gurney, a retired, but brilliant cop, is brought in to consult, but as his past rises up to ruin him, he’s not sure he can stop this mysterious and confusing killer. The characters in this book are not like those in your usual crime thrillers. They have depth and a realness you’ll recognize.

Before We Were Yours by Lisa Wingate- This book is based on the real-life story of Georgia Tann, the director of the Tennessee Children’s Home Society orphanage, who took poor children from their families, under the guise of providing them a better life, and sold them to wealthy parents in Memphis in the 1930’s and 1940’s. When her father doesn’t return right away from taking her mother to the hospital, Rill and her four siblings are taken by the orphanage. Rill fights to keep her brothers and sisters together. The book alternates between 1939 and the present day to Avery, a wealthy and successful South Carolina attorney. When Avery returns home because of her father’s sudden illness, a random encounter leads to questions she can’t answer and feelings she can’t seem to forget. What connects these two characters and how do you get over the feeling that you’re not where you belong.

I hope you all find the time to get in a good read or two this summer. Sometimes a little escape into a good book is exactly what you need.

Happy Reading!

♥ Erin

So, I’ve been at this mom thing for over eight years now, but I still have so much to learn. One of the most important things I have learned, the fact that took me the longest to concede, is that I can’t do it alone. Motherhood is tough! Sometimes I have so many balls in the air, I go to bed with my head spinning, and not just from those two glasses of wine I drank before bedtime. We now have an enormous and varied amount of responsibilities, and we all need help and support sometimes to get it all done, and to not go insane while doing it all.  Remember, it’s not a sign of failure to ask for help. This is something I’ve struggled with for years! Getting help for ourselves and our families is the smartest and strongest thing we can do as mothers!

Here are the local resources that I’ve personally used to simplify, or improve, my mom life. Click on the links below for more details and directions.

Favorite Places to Go With Babies/Toddlers:

• Jumpology – This trampoline arena has a specific time, 9-10 am, just for kids 6 and under.
• Pump It Up– The inflatable play area has Toddler Playtime on select Tuesdays from 10am – 11:30am for only $6.
• Music Together– Parent and Child music classes that come with a CD and song book. Check the link for locations across the Richmond area.
• Melody Magic Music Studio-This music studio on Lauderdale Ave. runs Kindermusik classes, beginner piano lessons and themed playdates.
• Willow Lawn Mommy and Me– Join Willow Lawn on the second Wednesday of EVERY month from 10am to 11:30am for a free morning out with live entertainment and activities designed to enhance parents´ interaction with their children held in The Square at Willow Lawn.
• Cartwheels and Coffee– Children ages six and under can enjoy playing in their enclosed playland while their grown-ups relax in the cafe with a great cup of locally roasted Blanchards coffee. They also have weekly events such as yoga, art and music classes. They even have a separate small play area for babies.
• GABC Music and Movement -This fun music class takes place every Wednesday, 10-10:45, with a separate playspace open 9:30-11 for play before and after class. Classes are inside Grove Avenue Baptist Church and are $5/child and $3/additional siblings.
• Henrico County Public Library Storytime– Storytimes run most mornings, M-Th, and they sometimes have family story times on Saturdays.  Click on the link to get the current story time schedule.
• Romp n’ Roll– My two year old is obsessed with these toddler gymnastics classes. They also offer art and music classes.

Shopping Your Life Easier:

Amazon Prime Now- I’m sure by now most of you know about this two-hour Amazon delivery service open to all prime members, but it’s so life-changing that I’m adding it here, just in case. Did you know they even deliver wine and beer now?! Just when I thought I couldn’t possibly love Amazon any more than I already do!

Target–  If Amazon is my boyfriend, then Target is definitely my BFF. Check out all the ways to save:

1. If you haven’t already, stop what you’re doing and sign-up for a Target debit card. It’s not another credit card. You can do this! You’ll save 5% on every thing you buy there, including purchases made at their Starbucks cafes!
2. Download the Target App– They are phasing out their Cartwheel app and making all of those discounts available inside the Target App. Try to look through the available discounts and add them before you leave your house. I usually forget to do this and end up manually scanning each of my cart items to see if any of them are discounted while my kids scream that they’re hungry and want to go home.
3. Check out this post here for more ways to save at Target.

Kroger Clicklist- I’ve been using this online shopping program for the past 6 months. It is amazing to get my shopping done in front of the TV and then pick it up without having to get any kids out of the car! I also save money because I’m not making impulse purchases or giving in to the whims of my tiny dictators while shopping. Don’t forget to add digital coupons onto your card before you checkout.

Walmart Savings Catcher– You can use this app to scan your Walmart receipts. If you’ve purchased something that they find cheaper somewhere else, they will refund you the difference. Find more specific details here.

Keeping Kids Healthy Through Every Stage:

• KidMed– This urgent care, designed especially for kids, has been a godsend for us many times. (Like the time my then 20 month old son climbed over the baby gate and fell down 12 stairs at 5 pm on a Friday!!) With 4 locations, they are very convenient. Hours are M-F, 2-10 pm and Weekends, 10 am-9 pm.
• Dental resource guide-This was created by River Run Dental. My entire family sees these dentists, and the hygienists are great with my kids. There are many other pediatric dentists offices in Richmond, (Check out those voted Best in Richmond here.), but this works best for us.
• Family therapy–Partners in Parenting– This is an outstanding office that works with not only children, but also their parents to teach them strategies to help their kids cope with difficult stages and situations.
• Speech/OT/PT Services

1. Speech/Language Providers– Here’s a list of local speech providers. My family has personal experience working with Maria Zanetti, and she does amazing things for kids with speech and language processing disorders.
2. Infant and Toddler Connection of Virginia– This is the place to contact if you’re having concerns with your toddler’s speech development. It is a several step process, and they will first have you come in for a screening. We went through the process in the Spring, so feel free to message me with any questions.
3. Prana OT- We have personal experience working with both of the occupational therapists in this office and recommend them highly for children with motor development and sensory processing issues.

• Pediatric and Adolescent Health Partners– This site has a great collection of health links and resources.

Great Websites For Local Resources:

Richmondmom.com– If you’re not visiting this site regularly, you need to start. It has resources and local info for basically every area of parenthood. Some of my personal favorites are:

• Kid-friendly Restaurant Resource
• Drop-in Child Care Resources
• Kids Eat Free Richmond
• Summer Camp Guide
• Support Groups for Parents Resource

These three sites also provide great local resources for parents, and update frequently to share kid-friendly events around town:

Completelykidsrichmond.com

MacaroniKid.com

Hula Frog.com

My Current Favorite Mom/Food Blogs:

Modern Parents, Messy Kids Blog– This site has a lot of great ideas to keep you and your family organized and parenting tips to keep you sane.

30 Handmade Days Blog– So many good finds here! Printables to keep you organized, Mom-tested experiments to try, craft projects you can actually make without pulling your hair out. Seriously awesome stuff!

Momastery.com– Glennon Doyle Melton is the author here,  and I love her. I feel like she says all of the things I want to say, but can’t put into words. Her honest advice on motherhood and self-love is very powerful.

Damndelicious.net– I initially started visiting this blog to make her awesome quinoa chili, but kept coming back for all of the easy, tasty recipes.

Thugkitchen.com– This site has a tri-fecta of some of my favorite things- 1) Amazing, easy vegan recipes 2) A large side of snark and 3) Enough cursing to make a sailor blush. #winning

Minimalistbaker.com– You can find quick, healthy meals here with 10 ingredients or less. My favorites I’ve personally tried are her banana bread granola and the crispy peanut tofu and cauliflower rice stir-fry.

Halfbakedharvest.com– Come check out Tieghan’s amazing and beautiful food that is surprisingly easy to make.

Now that I’ve completely overloaded you with information, I want to leave you with this: Forget all that bullshit about the mom who can do it all and who has it all together. She is a myth! Behind that well-polished facade and gleamingly perfect Instagram profile, she is probably a hot mess, or, at the very least, struggling just like the rest of us. Stop comparing yourself to people you don’t actually know.

We all have days we feel like we have this mom thing down and others when we feel like total failures who are strongly considering hiding under the bed with a jar of Nutella and never coming out! Even on your worst days, you are a good mom. Repeat after me: I Am A Good Mom! You’re showing up for your kids and just loving them, and that is enough. Use these resources. Talk to fellow moms who are out there in the trenches and, most importantly, listen, without judgement, without comparing, just neverending compassion and support.

♥ Erin

Good Morning Ladies,

Are you like me? Do you constantly beat yourself up for not meeting your own impossible expectations? We all really need to cut that out right now!  When you become a mother, you don’t turn in your human card and you don’t suddenly stop having needs of your own. It’s about damn time we start giving ourselves the break we deserve!  This post is really like a therapy session for me, but I hope it can help all of you beautiful mamas to give the mom guilt a rest!

Today I Am Giving Myself Permission….

• To Take Time For Myself– It took me too long to stop equating going to Body Back or hiring a babysitter to go out to dinner as selfish. I used to only go out for the night after my kids were already asleep. Every parent needs time to themselves and time away from their kids to recharge their batteries. If I don’t take it, I can’t be the mom that my kids deserve.
• To Reach For That Second Cup of Coffee or Alcoholic Beverage- Yes, I may have a slight addiction to caffeine and I may use alcohol to relax after  bedtime, but back off! After all, the days are long, but the years are short. At least that’s what every sweet old lady at Target keeps telling me!

• To Say No– I’ve struggled with this my entire life, but it is ok to say no to friends and family when what they’re asking for just won’t work for you. I know it doesn’t feel good to have someone upset with you, but no one has ever died from disappointment. They’ll get over it and you’ll learn to put your own needs first.
• To Have My Own Tantrum– We deal with loads of obnoxious and frustrating things daily with patience and grace, but sometimes we’re having a bad day, we’re sick, it’s “shark week”, etc. and we just can’t take it anymore! You’re allowed to cry, yell, have a timeout outside, whatever you need.

• To Throw Away My Bathroom Scale– I need to do this for my own sanity, and I think you should too. Enough said.
• To Not Clean My House– This is not a, you shouldn’t clean your house because you should be busy playing with your kids, thing. This is a, put the vacuum away and let the dishes sit in the sink while you sit on the couch with a trashy magazine, thing. God knows you deserve a break!

• To Lock the Bathroom Door While I’m Taking a Bath– My kids can live without me for fifteen minutes. Yes kids, you do have two parents who are capable of opening the fridge.

• To Not Send That Thank You Note–  If you know me, please never send me another thank you note. I know you are thankful for me and I am thankful for you. I’m always forgetting to send them, especially for my kids’ birthdays, and, when I do remember, they are always late. We can’t be perfect, and that’s ok.
• To Let My Kids Watch Too Much TV– I know this is a hot topic, but sometimes I just have so much to get done and I can’t answer another question about which Pokemon I would want to be. It’s ok to let TV be your babysitter once in a while. I watched a ton of it as a kid and I turned out, debatably, fine!

• To Order Takeout- I love to cook and I do try to serve my kids a vegetable with every meal, but I’m no Gwyneth. My kids eat their fair share of McDonalds and Taco Bell, and they haven’t grown any extra body parts from all of that processed food yet!
• To Go To Bed at 9 pm on Friday With No Shame– I still love a good night out, but sometimes it’s ok to admit that you’re not as young as you used to be and turn in early. Most days I’m exhausted all afternoon, but then have trouble sleeping at night so now, when I get the urge to pass out right after my kids are in bed, I take it.

• To Lose My Temper– Yes, I yell at my kids. I get in bad moods, and I have bad days. I am not a perfect parent, and my kids don’t need me to be.
• To Love My Mom Bod– This has been especially tough as I inch closer to forty. My metabolism has slowed to an almost complete stop and, despite my best efforts, my weight has been creeping up. I’m trying to accept my new body, and, instead of being disappointed or critical, to remember everything that it has accomplished and to be grateful for how healthy it is overall.

• To Bust Out in Spontaneous Song and Dance When My Kids Leave for a Night at Their Grandparents’ House– I love my kids, but that doesn’t mean I have to spend every waking moment with them. It’s ok to be excited and happy to have some time away from them, and it doesn’t make you a bad parent. It just makes you an honest one.

• To Take a Compliment– No more shrugging off compliments! No more, “Yeah, well, anyone can do that.” No more, “This, no, it’s not that special.” Let’s try, “Yes, you’re right. That does look great on me.” or, “Yes, I am awesome at that!” I mean, you don’t need to say that aloud, a simple thank you is great, but you get the point. Stop downplaying compliments! Now is the time to accept that you are awesome and appreciated!
• To Celebrate and Appreciate Myself– Why am I so good at loving and taking care of my family and friends, but horrible at being caring and kind to myself? We all deserve to be cared for and feel special, especially when we put so much time and effort into giving to others. Though it would be nice, I can’t expect someone else to do it for me. I’m working on loving and caring for myself by trying to treat myself the way I treat other people I care about. It’s a work in progress, but I’m getting there!

Just in case it wasn’t clear, I’m also giving YOU permission to do all of these things, and anything else you need to do to keep sane. Not that you need my permission, of course, but you can feel free to blame me if you get any negative feedback while you’re taking care of yourself for a change. In fact, you can even send me the complainer’s phone number. I’ll sort them out! And don’t forget:

♥ Erin

It’s almost summer! This is mostly thrilling, especially after the winter and 2nd winter we’ve had, but is anyone else kicking themselves for not sticking to their New Year’s resolutions to eat healthier and workout more? I am no where near where I hoped I’d be with swimsuit season looming, but really, who gives a fuck!? Can we all promise to quit the body shaming this summer and instead focus on our mental health with self-love and self-care?

My June-olutions:

I will praise my body for being healthy and strong enough to give birth, feed and care for my baby. It’s easy to get caught up in what our bodies are not. However, when we spend all our time focusing on losing the baby weight, or just finding our abs again (speaking from personal experience here), we lose sight of everything our bodies have done and continue to do every day. Our bodies have so much more to offer than just perky boobs and a flat stomach.

I will look in the mirror and give myself at least one compliment every day. Doing the opposite is so much easier, I grant you, but why are we doing that crap to ourselves. I know you’re all hot mamas and there has to be at least one thing you like about your bodies. If you’re still having trouble, ask a girl friend because, I assure you, they will have a list of your finest attributes ready to go before you finish asking the question.

I will be more active with my family. Working out seven days a week is a great goal, but it’s not always doable. If instead you resolve to play, to run, to wrestle with your kids, you’ll be working out without even knowing it and having a blast in the process. If you have older kids, try signing up for some fun runs or walks together, start family karate lessons or go ice skating.

I will laugh more. We should all strive for more laughter this year! Let’s laugh more with our kids. Let’s laugh more at ourselves. Let’s see life for the crazy, sometimes painful, sometimes joy-filled, roller coaster ride that it is and just laugh!

I will remove the words, “I’m fine”, from my vocabulary. Sometimes you are just NOT fine! Be honest with your family and, especially, be honest with yourself. Talk to your spouse when you are angry or hurt. When a trusted friend or family member asks how you are and you’re really struggling, by all means, share with them. You’re not a burden to them. They love you and will gladly take time to be there for you. It’s ok to not be ok all of the time.

I will make the invisible visible. The hardest part of motherhood has to be the mental workload. Someone has to remember to schedule the well check-ups, research preschools and remember to pick up a gift for some random two year old’s birthday party. It’s easy to ask your spouse to do the dishes or change the laundry, but all of this other invisible work typically goes unnoticed. The pressure to be on top of everything all of the time is exhausting! Get your spouse in on the invisible work by asking them to pick out that gift or to research and find a good and reliable babysitter. The world doesn’t have to rest on your shoulders!

 I will ask for help when I need it. This goes along with the last two, and it is something I struggled with even before having kids. You DO NOT get extra good mom points for doing everything completely on your own. When a friend notices the overwhelmed look on your face and asks if they can keep your kids for a few hours, let them. When the bagger at the grocery store sees you have your hands full and asks if they can walk you out to your car, let them. When you’re sick and can barely get out of bed, ask your husband to come home from work early or call a babysitter. No one can do this job completely alone, so cut the shit and accept the help!

I will be as kind to myself as I expect other people to be to my kids. OMG, I go full Mama Bear when I think someone is being cruel or unfair to my kids! Why, then, do I allow myself to say such horrible things about another person I claim to love, me! If I heard someone calling my kids fat, stupid or useless, there is honestly no telling what I’d do, but I’m guessing it would involve fire.

I will believe that I am enough. Being perfect is not the goal, unless you’re going for being perfectly average, but, honestly, some days I can’t even claim that. We need to remember that, while we struggle to plan the world’s most Pinterest perfect first birthday party or blame our kids’ minor illnesses on our lack of perfect housekeeping skills, our kids eyes are lighting up every time we enter a room. We are not perfect, and they could not love us more!

I will put my oxygen mask on first. This one is all about self-care. I know we all want to be great mothers, wives, daughters, etc., but that simply can’t be accomplished if we are too sleep-deprived, overwhelmed or depressed to function. If you’re not already doing this, please take time out for yourself. Lock yourself in the bathroom and meditate for five minutes. Go to a Moms Night Out and commiserate with other moms who’ve been there. Tell your spouse (Don’t ask!) that you’re going out to Target, and spend an hour mindlessly wandering the aisles. It will help. If that’s not enough, please find a therapist. Ask a mom you trust. You may think you’re the only one struggling and needing therapy, but you are not alone. It’s not a failure to admit that you need more help. In fact, it’s the bravest thing you can do for yourself and for your family.

I hope this summer brings you every happiness and the knowledge that you are strong, worthy and beautiful women that your sons and daughters can look up to.

♥ Erin

Hey Mamas, I’m going to get real with you today. For as long as I can remember, I have struggled with anxiety. I always blamed it on my fairly traumatic childhood, but then I had children of my own, and man, it was an eye-opener.

My husband and I created a stable home our kids, full of love, trust and laughter. Somehow though, I still have two very anxious children (The jury is still out on the little one.), who struggle with transitions, change and the unknown.

At first this reality was hard for me to accept. I gave my kids what I never had, how can they still be anxious?? I blamed myself, and felt a lot of guilt about unknowingly passing on my anxiety. Then I got to thinking, you can’t blame yourself for biology and body chemistry. Anxiety is just a part of my makeup that my kids have shared with me since birth, like my blue eyes, my love of pickles and my great taste in music.

I’m just a tiny bit of a control freak by nature (hahaha!), but realizing that I couldn’t stop my kids from being anxious was kind of liberating. It allowed me to stop blaming myself and instead teach them the coping strategies I’d picked up throughout my anxious life. It made me realize that I can’t “fix” them, but I can be exactly the role model they need. I can teach them that living with anxiety doesn’t have to limit their lives.

The coping strategies below can be used for you to help yourselves and your children live with anxiety and live well. I also included a few important things to remember when thinking about anxiety.

Deep Breathing- At our house we call this kind of breathing, balloon belly breathing. Make sure it’s your belly that is rising, not your chest. There are so many types of breathing exercises out there, so feel free to keep experimenting until you find something that works for you. I love these deep breathing exercise cards for kids from Childhood 101.

Tapping- This technique involves tapping with your fingertips on 9 specific meridian points on the body while focusing on the source of your anxiety. It is also known as EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) and it’s an ancient Chinese holistic practice that is being used by cognitive behavioral therapists around the world. Tapping calms the nervous system and helps restore balance to the brain. Visit this site for Tapping 101 and a video that explains the 9 meridian points.

Grounding with 5-4-3-2-1- Take a deep breath and then use your five senses to find 5 things you see, 4 things you can touch, 3 things you can hear, 2 things you smell and one thing you can taste in your mouth. This strategy gets you back to the present moment and is especially good with treating past trauma. Find out more here.

Guided Meditation– There are many specific meditations tailored to coping with anxiety on apps like Headspace and Insight Timer.

Give Yourself a Squeeze or Use a Weighted Blanket– A good hug, even if you’re giving it to yourself, can lower the stress hormone, cortisol, and give you a burst of oxytocin and dopamine to promote a sense of well-being. A weighted blanket can have a similar effect. I’ve been considering getting one of these senso blankets or something similar on Amazon, to keep in our bed for those nights that our kids have nightmares.

Muscle Tense and Release or Progressive Muscle Relaxation– Start with your toes and then move on to each small muscle group in your body. Tense the muscles for three seconds and then release. Focus on how your muscles feel on the release. This has been known to help with physical symptoms that are caused by stress and anxiety like headaches and stomachaches. There are also guided meditations to help you through this process. To learn more visit this site.

Take a Hot Bath or a Shower– All of the fancy well-researched strategies above just weren’t practiced when I was a kid, so this simple technique was pretty much the only one in my toolbox. I thought of the bathtub as a magical place where all of my worries could just melt away. Even as adult you can tell when I’m really stressed because I may take more than one bath in a day. After all this time, the strategy still holds up.

Try a Distracting Activity- Something repetitive that you can do with your hands is usually a good idea. Find something that you enjoy doing that is fairly repetitive; knitting, drawing, playing with play dough, jewelry making, puzzling, playing board or computer games. You can also try an activity that you can easily escape into like a good book or movie.

Write a Worry Script- When worries keep you from sleeping or wake you up in the middle of the night, get that crap out of your head! Use a journal to write down what you are worried about. Explore the negative emotions that the worries bring up. You can face your fears in a safe space and really imagine what the worst case scenario would look like.

Review Past Anxieties- Think back to the last time you felt really anxious. What was the worst thing that happened? What did you do that helped?

Don’t Be Afraid of Medication– I’ll be honest, I always was. I didn’t get the help I needed because I didn’t want to be the person who needed medication to function. I know there may be more of a stigma related to mental illness, but, if you or your child had asthma, you probably wouldn’t skip the inhaler because you didn’t want to medicate them.

Medication shouldn’t be the only solution, but when used in connection with the cognitive behavior therapy it can work wonders to help kids reduce anxiety enough to learn the positive coping strategies they need to become healthy adults. Our pediatrician explained it to me like this: Kids are going to develop coping strategies to deal with their anxiety and these will be either positive or negative strategies. If they can’t manage their anxiety enough to focus on the positive strategies, they will only have once choice remaining. That really made me think and reshaped my opinion on medicating my own children.

Anxiety isn’t all bad– Despite what we’ve been taught, anxiety can be a positive thing. Your worries can help you stay safe, plan ahead and make better, more informed choices. For more,  read about the 6 Hidden Benefits of Anxiety.

Find more great strategies and ideas on how to manage anxiety on the sites below:

Coping Strategies for Supporting Students

50 Strategies to Beat Anxiety

Calming Anxiety- Coping Skills for Kids

If you’ve been battling with anxiety, you’re not alone. The progress might feel slow, and your kids might do things that trigger your worst fears on the regular, but just keep going. You are a great parent because you are showing up every day and doing the best you can.

♥ Erin